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Triumph boys!
I was finally able to overcome my fear and I made a cold approach, just minutes ago. I'm so excited that I was able to do it and I wanted to tell some people who actually cared. Big deal, your thinking...I haven't made an approach in at least 5 years and have been really struggling with paralyzing dread, not fear or nervousness, actual dread. As if you just told me I'm being deployed to fight Russians on the Kursk battlefront. So, hurray for me!, it's vag as far as the eye can see from here on out. Be good.
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New comment 15h ago
Field Report
Well, I got laid. Technically this is the first vag penetration I've experienced in about 2.5 years that I can remember. I got bj's from the Turkish prostitute and the SA girl earlier this year but those don't really count. This girl was no prize but she was nice. I met her on FB dating, and she wasn't super hot in her pics but at least she was reasonably honest about it. She's about a 5 on a good day, but overall I'm happy about it. I've kind of been hungry for a little human physical tough tbh, so I did what I could to tee this one up and it worked. We went out for a coffee date two days ago in a nice golf course community coffee shop. I remember what Paul said about 3 location changes, so we sat inside and chatted and then outside next to a nice fountain. I was just myself, joking around mostly but not pushing too hard. She was reciprocating. Again she's not super hot but I still kind of liked her nerdy vibe. She was sending attraction signals, touching me occasionally etc. She had to go to a Halloween thing but said she wanted to see me again. She's off for fall break so we set up a sushi date for today. I went in for a kiss and she reciprocated and gave me a big hug. We met at the sushi place today at 1pm, shared a pre date kiss, and had lunch for an hour. I have a comedy song I wrote that's PG - R (and X) and I added some R rate lyrics with her name in it and she laughed. I told her I'd like to keep hanging out after lunch and she agreed to walk over and see a movie together. We made out a bit in the elevator. Once inside we sat down and were the only ones in the whole theater so we made out a little more. (side note - I think a movie is still a good place to go on a date esp since nobody else was in there). She put her hand on my knee and I played with her underwear area aka pussy. At this point I couldn't really move too much so I told her I want to fuck her. She said not in here and then I was worried the high school kid was going to call security. This is also next to a comedy club I perform at so I didn't need to get arrested. So we went back to her place which was closer.
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Not sure how to approach a girl I had a date with and how to gauge her interest on next meeting
Hi everyone. Recently I met a girl through online (she's 20). We hit a good vibe on Instagram with some teasing and jokes in there and agreed to go for a date. I chose a cozy coffee place which allows us to talk closely. On the date, she was very talkative and gave a lot of information on how much stuff she has in her life, things she's doing and wants to do, and as a good listener I just let her talk, occasionally throwing in some things about me. We have things in common but she wasn't asking much about me, rather talking more about herself. We still had a great talk and as cafe closed I asked her if she'd like to move to a bar and she agreed, and we spent another hour in a bar with a good atmosphere. I made a mistake of not asking the waiter to switch our table so I could sit closer to her and thus I couldn't get any touching going on. (A mistake I fixed on the next date at this exact same bar with another girl). We still had a good time just talking though and at the end of the date I asked her what she's looking for. She said she's looking for new aquaintances, and if a relationship happens, it will happen, but nothing serious as she's busy. I am completely fine with that, but here are my questions finally: She's always very busy and we probably will meet only on next week (2 weeks since the first date). How do I overall treat this type of "success" girl relating to me behaving around her, how do I escalate and gauge her interest in me? From what I saw before, I can't really say she's that interested in sleeping with me and if I force level 2 or 3 behaviours I feel like she could be scared off
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Nervous about date and I can’t tell why.
I’m going on a date this Friday. She’s the friend of a plate I had for many years, knows entirely too much about the sexual history I had with her friend back in the day (she would brag), and (this might be all in my head) might see me as a bit of the playboy character I acted up to get away with what I now see as self-doubt. (I got laid, but not always for the right reasons. Recovering people pleaser realizing that I wasn’t some “natural” all along) I rarely use social media, but I recently posted a picture from a wedding. She reached out immediately, and I escalated quickly. Now, we have a date lined up. Here is the problem: I’m ALREADY too much in my head, I can tell. I’m not being outcome-independent; I keep seeing her picture and wishing it would go well. Hard to know if it is because I have convinced myself that this is the kind of girlfriend I want to have going forward (no way of knowing any of this, but I see her as stable, boring in the right way, repressed girl with a religious background that just wants to be tossed around), or if it is because I know that even if I could lay enough game to get her that night (which I can) its everything else that stresses me out (where I am in life, how much time I can devote to an ongoing thing before I have to choose myself, whether it being authentic or not) This past year, I’ve done the online dating thing to kill time, got laid out of boredom or what I saw as a natural progression, and kept plates for 4-6 months, but nothing I didn’t know from the get-go would be temporary. Never any cold approach (working up the courage / just don't care), and definitely no one from my past. In my many years in red-pilled spaces, this is perhaps the second time that I’ve ever taken the time to write about women, as it wasn’t why I was drawn here. But coming out of a divorce, deep depression, and documenting my growth, I’m at the point in my life where I’m ready to both date intentionally (for my sake) and lead like the man that I am, knowing I wasn’t crazy for feeling the ways I was.
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New comment Sep 10
Nervous about date and I can’t tell why.
[Field Report] Coffee shop meeting leads to date
I was out in a coffee shop late afternoon on Saturday getting some planning work done. To the front right of me were a group of 3 girls doing work. We bantered a little bit. Partway through my work session, I get up to go to the restroom. When I get back, there’s a note on my desk asking if I was single. I put my number on it, and got a response once I left the cafe. I set up a date for the next day. Now, leading up to the date, I noticed a familiar pattern. I got nervous, which is okay, but I started to fantasize. It used to be really bad the last few times, and shows that I started to invest into this girl even before really getting to know her. The date started off good - high interest from the girl, I took the lead. I noticed a few mistakes I made - I took the 90-10 rule too far and talked way too much in the first 30 mins. The goal was to reduce tension initially and get into good conversation but I ended up talking a little too much. I will say the girl was also equally invested in the conversation. At some point, I started talking about philosophy(oops) and for a split second I thought the girl rolled her eyes. That’s all it took for my inner game to crumble and I started to slip back into my shell of anti rejection behaviors. After that the date went sideways, though I still lead effectively and managed logistics well all the way to the end. I had a talk with Paul yesterday that really cleared up a lot of the major underlying beliefs that drove the shift in my behavior and what has been holding me back for a long while. For accountability- I’m digging into these beliefs over this weekend. I’ll be making a post before Monday detailing what I learn from my exploration; I’ve already learned some wild things about identity and how it relates to boundaries and social programming.
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New comment Jul 22
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