I am 24, from Czech republic. I am currently working on regaining self respect and decisiveness. I have largely been an actual nice guy when growing up, endlessly giving without expectations or being sour about what I get in return. Just genuinely enjoyed helping my close ones. It was only when I started my last relationship, now of nearly 3 years with a girl that is honestly incompetent, maturity of a teenager and ego as tough as wet tissue paper that I started souring. I have been housing and feeding her, and while surviving her constant tantrums I have put myself into the martyrdom of being her surrogate father basically - the only other choice was making her homeless which I am even now unable to do. This led to me also realizing how bad my family and friends reacted to my setting of boundaries on my time and help, which led down the rabbit hole of realizing that there was always so much bitching and moaning from all those important to me whenever I needed even minor help when growing up. The relationship is in shambles and we broke up temporarily while I still housed her, as am now, during which time she sought the attention of men who "make her feel like a woman" and generally her increasing the abuse and putting me down even more as she tried to rationalize that our lack of chemistry and love is caused by my inferiority to other men. So working on getting past this right now, trying to let go of the 10% of the time my girlfriend was very lovely, and trying to reconnect with my family, friends and hobbies that I all stonewalled due to focusing all my energy on being a "parent" walking on eggshells and constantly using kid gloves for years now.

I’ve pretty much had the same hobby for 25 years. But given a big tangled mess of issues (the same ones that bring me to Brojo) it’s become more stressful and depressing than entertaining. So I’m on the hunt for alternatives. For reference, I’ve been dancing one or more of salsa/bachata/kizomba/zouk since 1999. It’s pretty challenging finding something that fills the gaps in fitness, social intros, nights at the bar, IRL tinder, and regular travel destinations for big events. Plus of course finding something I find interesting. So, let’s have a discussion about what you guys get yourselves up to. PS, I’ve done a few PT boxing sessions at the gym, which has got me to look at the nearby boxing gyms and Krav Maga options. I plan to check out a few trial classes.

Welcome everyone to the Brojo Integrity Army community! Thank you all so much for joining. Actions: 1) Please write a post introducing yourself - where you're from, what you're working on, and anything else you want people to know about you e.g. your most recommended self-development resources 2) Check out the other recent posts and offer support, encouragement, and advice (if asked) to join in the discussion 3) Go sign up to the Nice Guy Recovery course in the Classroom tab - it's open entry and free! 4) Join the 30 Day Social Confidence Boost Challenge! It’s free :) https://brojo.aweb.page/p/e9b073a7-2c8c-45c1-99df-8014fb7dcf49 5) Start liking and commenting on posts - this will gain you points and help you move up the ranks. As you move up, you'll unlock free courses and win prizes!! Some group rules to keep in mind: - No solicitation without my approval - do not offer your services or products as posts or private comments to other members - if someone does this, let me know immediately. This will result in a permanent ban. - Keep it respectful and try to help each other out. Disagreement is fine, abuse is not. - This page is exclusively about self-development, so discussions on unrelated topics (e.g. politics) will get deleted. - If anything in this group bothers you for whatever reason, please personally message me and I'll try to sort it out Thanks, and enjoy the community!! Dan Check out the 3min video below to learn how to use this platform

(Each week I'll feature a course with a 7-day discount!) -------------------- "Blasting Through Setbacks" - Just $5 for this week only! Things WILL Go Wrong... If you're not equipped to deal with things going wrong, you're going to struggle with a lot of life. Life doesn't care about your goals or plans. Life doesn't care about your hopes and expectations. And life certainly doesn't care about your opinion on how things "should" go. Your behaviour is under your control... everything else in life is not! In this course, we're going to dive into what happens when your carefully planned goals don't end up working out like you'd hoped. We're going to look at dealing with "derailers" (people/things that interfere), obstacles, setbacks, and failures - the real-life problems you'll face in your journey of growth. We'll talk about how to prevent things going wrong as much as humanly possible so that when they do go wrong you know you've done all you can. We will explore the philosophy and mindset you need to cultivate to ensure your reaction to things going wrong is healthy and helpful. We will draw up detailed step-by-step responses to derailers, obstacles, setbacks, and failures, to ensure you grow from these problems rather than fall. No battle plan survives contact with the enemy. So let's talk about how to manage the inevitable surprises life has in store for you... Get it this week only for just $5! https://www.skool.com/brojo-the-integrity-army-6491/classroom/82f3ffc6?md=78d86eed4f6f47c9acd0fc2b73b7a400

They felt overwhelmed with so much content available on youtube and with the skool courses. I thought my reply might be helpful for others here too. "Hey dude, the key to optimising learning is you have got to work backwards from your goal. Our brains are freaking learning machines and we get in our own way. 1. Know your outcome (what are you learning about and for what purpose?.) If reading this book/watching this video got you the desired result - what does that look like? Be as specific as possible. How are you different after learning this. 2.Have a clear intent with your why with learning - don't get muddled up with self vanity metrics of ticking off books on your reading list or thinking you have to go through every video or needing to remember every detail. Be clear about your intent. If its watching videos on confidence, then get ready to use the information in your domain confidently. 3. Apply what your learning - go tell others about it (teaching is the best way to retain information) Even if its txting a friend or family member or go write a blog or comment somewhere on the internet. Follow these three steps and you will learn to be on a different level. Not the information overload level the other level. BIG hint the most effective way to learn is about the attitude. An attitude of having a goal and being curious about learning ways and things/concepts that will get you there faster. And more easily."