Recent Realizations on Building Authentic Mental Power

One of the potentially troubling aspects of seeking to live with integrity is the sheer pervasiveness of ideological cultural control. Namely, it is structurally built into our knowledge and the main purpose of contemporary social science is propagandize for hegemonic values. Foucault has done masterful lifetime work as far as historically how language structure power, but there are many precedents. If you read the existentialists, Kierkegaard, Nietzsche, Heidegger, Sartre, a central theme is the sheer difficulty, mental fortitude, and strong vigilance required to live and decide by praxis / "Will to Power" / "Being in Nothing" etc. which are all concepts centering around personal integrity. Often personal hubris leads people to take on new values confidently, but really they've been mentally entrapped by some competing ideology.

In that sense, since no one is the uberman, and it would be mentally exhausting to be so, it is actually sensible to find and appropriate a meta-narrative. The point is, now, that the meta-narrative is to be CHOSEN deliberately, rather than merely absorbed by osmosis in one's cultural milieu.

I had recently gone rather "Doomer" as far as my overall mindset towards the world at large. And while some specific details may have merit as far as political and economic history, as a way of living life, and also in relating to people, it's not empowering or useful.

At the same time, the instinct towards "doomer" thinking was natural, but it should be made more precise. Rather, I reject not meta-narrative itself, but the two predominant cultural ideologies of our contemporary period of time in the West. These would be Christendom -- it had a good run, the protestant work ethic brought a lot of historical prosperity, but it had it's day and now it is justifiably disappearing from being compelling to people. The other one is decadence, as associated with the progressive urban monoculture, based on the principle that one's impulsive emotions and desires are valid and should be accommodated and even prioritized.

Then alternatively I have made the decision to convert to Tengrism/animism/shamanism. By having an intellectual and spiritual basis and grounding (and from my research the ideas are compelling and strong, and the unity with nature a great rejection of the bullshit bubble of our time), existing in the social world no longer feels like a constant onslaught of attempted oppression and subjugation.

Practically, it gives a solidity towards answering questions that are framed within the cultural narratives in these two hegemonic ideologies:

E.g.

"Why don't you have a girlfriend?"

"I am not a Christian, and I do not find Monotheistic values compelling, and so I do not engage with institutions, such as long term monogamy, that were invented by this cultural ideology. Currently I am celibate, but I have previously, and upon completing my period of celibacy, intend to return to, my shamanic practice, as far as sexuality and my relationship to Kali, the divine feminine"

"Stay up with us later, c'mon, another bar!"

"I really appreciate the evening, I'm having plenty of fun. I actually do want to continue and party all night with you guys. But that's precisely the reason why I have to now go home and leave you. My ability to decline my personal desires is an important part of my spiritual practice"

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