Title is self explanatory. This is pretty useful info to know for vetting women and leading relationships: https://youtu.be/EoGvdQ1rVdM?si=4wiCJJpkRA1sfjOt

Hey guys, just wanted to address this. Over the past 5 years the "men's improvement space" has gotten worse and worse. And since I have been coaching 100's of guys during this time, I am seeing how this terrible advice has caused guys to fuck up. Some of this advice has come from people I consider friends. I am not critical of them because I think they mean well. But if the advice isn't good, then I am not going to endorse it. And here in my own community (away from the public eye) I will be critical of bad advice when it is appropriate, even if I like some of the people who have said those things. I won't call people out, but I will tell you the truth about what is good and what isn't. The reason some of the ideas are so bad out there are as follows: 1. It is general advice. So something that might be generally true could be untrue in your situation. This is the biggest reason guys mess up. You have to be able to understand the nuance. 2. Likes, views, and subscribers don't reward good advice. It rewards what algorithms promote, and what is popular and what is entertaining. This causes youtubers to dispense advice based on the rewards of views and likes rather then based on what works. 3. People in general have shitty mindsets and bad relationships. People also like to hear things that confirm their existing ideas rather then things that will challenge them or get them results. So the bad advice and ideas end up winning over shit that works. 4. There are small few of these guys who are great with women, but most of these guys on the internet are not very good with women at all. I've hung out with and met many of these people, so trust me on this.They got into the space because they weren't good at it, then learned about shit academically rather then through practical application. They may have gotten some limited results, but generally aren't applying what they talk about. So now they are on the internet talking about shit academically to other guys who are learning about relationships academically. But none of them are going out and having real relationships and experiences with women. Same can be said about other areas outside of relationships. 5. Having access to women because some guys create a business and a lifestyle that puts them in places where there are hot women (like podcasters or party promoters) doesn't mean that they are good with women or have any business giving anyone advice. Many of these guys are off putting, pay for pussy or offer favors for pussy, and couldn't game their way out of anything. 6. People with youtube channels tend to just copy each others shit. So when bad advice gets attention, it tends to travel fast and get repeated. And no one seems to want to point out how stupid some of this shit sounds lol. 7. Sometimes guys with good advice end up giving advice that is outdated because they are out of the game. They don't coach guys who are in the game regularly, and they are now in relationships so they don't talk to women anymore. They can't tell you how a 22 year girl acts in 2024 because they last time they talked to a 22 year old was in 2004. Now it is fine if they are not in the game, that isn't the problem. But they don't talk to guys or coach guys who are, so they are just disconnected and some of the advice falls short.

Hey guys, back from the woods without internet and getting caught up to your questions and Dm's, and thought I would share this with you. I had a very popular men's coach share with me part of an interview on youtube from another popular psychologist where he talked about "not changing people." To sum it up, he worded it "if you want to love you have to accept your partner." He was asking me what I thought about this and if I agreed with the advice. Here was my response: He is making one of those safe arguments that sounds true, is true in some ways, but is also misleading and the reason why red pill guys without game are single. What he says is true in the sense that you you need to accept who she in terms of her innate traits and with what she is capable of and with how she wants to be. Like if a girl is an extraverted type who loves social events, you shouldn’t try to transform her into someone who abandons her social circles and never goes to social events. Just for example. If you want a girl who is introverted and who would rather stay home than go out, pick a girl who is already that way. So that part is right and I agree. Where it is misleading is that people will take this as “Oh, this bad behavior that isn’t conducive of a good relationship is just ‘who’ she is.” Not true. People confuse innate traits with changeable behaviors. That’s where the fuck up is: assuming something is innate when it's just behaviors that can change, or assuming something is "fixable" when it isn't because it is who she is. Is what she is doing based on "who she is," or is it a learned behavior that she would be willing to change? In the example above, the extroverted girl who likes social events doesn’t need to go out on girls nights, out to boat parties where girls are pressured to offer pussy for access, and to go out and drink and abuse drugs to “be social”. She can go to charity events, join social clubs, or just have a healthy group of girl friends and family that plan and do fun things to be “herself.”

Lol the title isn’t me… I already have one anyway. That is how a lot of guys think and feel so let's look at it. A common thing for guys who are young and haven’t had abundance of dating experiences, or for guys who have gotten out of a marriage or bad relationship and haven’t been with a woman in awhile is to get that empty, sad feeling inside about not having a woman in their lives. This leads to the natural consclusion of a guy “wanting a girlfriend.” This may be the natural conclusion to you reading this but picture this. You have no less than 3 women you have sexual access too at all times who are pretty gorgeous and fun to be with. How would you feel about “needing a girlfriend” if that were the case? You wouldn’t need a girlfriend. You would be having a lot of fun as a single guy. Now, after awhile you might decide that you want a better match for a long term companion, as that would be very natural and the conclusion that most guys with this abundance come too. But that guy doesn’t feel pain and sadness and a stabbing in their gut because they “don’t have a girlfriend.” The guy with abundance knows its just a matter of time and the right person, and they are busy enjoying life while they can WITHOUT the commitment, even if that is what they eventually want. A guy had a question about this, so thought I would share. His question was: “Hey Paul, I remember maybe in one of your livestreams you mentioned it’s not good to feel an emotional pull to have a girlfriend. I’m writing this as I noticed just now I had a similar feeling. Just going shopping and I saw 2 attractive couples talking and having a good time, not really doing anything specific. I felt a pull and some pain and the thought “damn I wish I had a girlfriend”. Why is this not good and what do I do about it?” Here is my answer: Let me clarify. It is ok to want a girlfriend someday or to feel a pull towards a healthy long term relationship. But the pain of "damn I wish I had a girlfriend" comes from scarcity that will fuck up your game.