8d ago in Journal 📝
Trying my Best.
The week didn’t start well.
Communication at home with my partner isn’t good.
Our relationship has been in a very fragile place for a long time.
I think that, for me, the situation feels like this, and as for her – I honestly don’t really know what to think anymore.
I feel like I’m taking away her joy, and she’s taking away mine. For quite some time, we just haven’t been communicating well with each other.
There are moments that are okay, but there’s always this cloud of chaos hanging over our relationship.
On top of all that, I’m in a new job where I really want to succeed, and I’m under pressure that I can’t seem to shake off.
I feel trapped between my desire to succeed and to be a good family man.
I feel like I don’t have a single place in my life that feels safe.
It’s a very difficult feeling for me. I didn’t know I lacked self-confidence to this extent.
I’m in therapy, I’m also in couples’ therapy, and I’m pouring everything out here in this community as well.
I’m longing for the moment when I’ll feel like things are starting to come together. God knows how much my heart is in the right place, even though my actions don’t always align with it.
I love my children and my partner, and I hope they love me back.
Sorry for the brutal honesty, but this is who I am, for better or worse.
Wishing for lighter days for the mind and the soul.
Love.
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Trying my Best.
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