The Performer: Seeking Approval and Validation

I often work with people whom I call “the performer”. What distinguishes these people from others is their specific set of behaviours, attitudes and beliefs: they are generally extroverted, with an external locus of control, and they are masters at performing in front of people.

What this means is that they are generally an extroverted person and they believe that the control is outside of themselves.

They often highlight their strengths.

They put on a show to try and gain approval from the people around them.

They hide their weaknesses from people whom they are trying to impress.

Their core belief are often:

I must be impressive.

I must be approved of.

I must be validated to be a good person.

I must have other people like me to be a good person.

If you see some of these behaviours, attitudes and beliefs in yourself chances are you're going to frequently experience a constant pressure to achieve, succeed, and perform, especially around people that you’re unfamiliar with.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here:

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