Myths and bodies · Brojo: The Integrity Army

Myths and bodies

One of the things I have in my life is chronic fatigue and pain. (CFS, chronic fatigue is alsolled M. E., myalgic encephalitis, in some countries). Badicly it means my body is weakened, sore, and in pain. And tired, like so tired I often wake feeling I've run a marathon, and some afternoons I'm almost crying for exhaustion and fall asleep at my work, or at home, and can barley drive I'm so tired.

That's one of the things that makes life hard. I do my best not to use it as another way of staying stuck in my past, and some days it does overwhelm me, and details my courage quest practices. I am not well practiced yet at stepping up, speaking up in the moment, etc, and fatigue makes it harder, and I do keep going mostly...andsimetimes I crash. I find it hard to be compassionate with myself when I do. My old ways were to keep pushing inefectualy fawning and self hating, or run and hide and berate myself in essentially a freeze. I can still get hijacked that way sometimes. I find liking myself, going easy on myself, and keeping myself going hard work. I feel often at the bottom of Maslows heirachy of needs, and at huge deficit. I think too, as an artist and dreamer / fantasist, I probably tried to bypass the foundational work and just play in the self actualisation higher realms. An icarus way of life. I know addiction is often likened to Icarus, so that fits too.

In terms of myth, I desire a more grounded mthy, with integrity, generativity, and ability to be fully in the world.

In terms of enotiins/ psychology/ behaviour, I desire to keep growing in courage and honesty, and help my mind / body / spirit be it's best.

I intial was going to write, I have CFS, it inpeses my life. How do others work with keeping goung with physical ailments?, as I fukn struggle sometimes to give my best when my body feels wrecked.

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