Lost · Apperception Alliance

Lost

I am a first-year student studying abroad. At first, I had big goals. I felt like this new life will change me forever but now when I have only exams left to finish and looking back at what I learned in university I feel like I didn't do enough and didn't really learn things that will be useful in the future. I have been having this lost feeling and the fear of not knowing what to do for a while now. If I have questions or want to know some tips I watch videos or ask others for advice. But I know that the real issue is in me. I have tried to understand what I want from this life and what I should do to achieve my goals but it's like I am getting distracted by other things and I am just letting life pass now. I want to change my life. I try new things and try to stay consistent with it but I still give up. And I am just falling back to my old habits.

I have not been really doing things in university and I regret it a lot. My grades are low and I can't seem to find my purpose in life. Even though I regret not studying I still don't do it. And I know that what I am writing might seem very depressing or lost but that's how I am living. Day to day I have those same thoughts everyday and I don't take any action. Maybe mindlessly scrolling by watching tiktok videos and instagram reels has done this to me.

So, if there are people that have faced this problem in the past or now feeling like this can give some advice or at least write a comment it would really help me and I will know that I am not alone. At this point, I am ready to do anything to change my life.

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