Finding Your Purpose vs. Building Your Identity

10d ago (edited) in 📜 General Discussion

Find your purpose" is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot in men's self-development circles. But I've noticed that many men struggle with this saying, "I don't know what my purpose is." They often feel directionless, lack motivation, or talk about doing things without following through.

From my own experience, I’ve realised that focusing on something tangible, like fitness, can be a great starting point. Fitness is often cited as a cornerstone for building discipline and momentum in life. As Stefan Aarnio discusses in Hard Times Create Strong Men, a man’s purpose is deeply connected to his work to consistently push forward and create value.

But here’s the thing: before finding purpose, I believe it’s more important to focus on identity.

Your identity is the foundation of who you are. It’s about understanding how you see yourself, how you respond to challenges, and what your strengths and weaknesses are. This self-awareness gives you a clearer picture of what drives you, and from that, purpose often emerges naturally.

From my own journey, I’ve found that it’s rare to meet people who are truly living out a "purpose." However, the ones who succeed are often those who’ve built a resilient identity one rooted in persistence, discipline, and the refusal to quit.

So, what do you think? Is it more important to focus on building your identity first, with purpose following naturally? Or should we be aiming to "find our purpose" right away? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

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