Ever since I started playing I always had that aim of being a professional but constantly struggled with confidence and motivation. I feel like this over time gave me such a negative perception of football to the point where playing it wasn't fun, i would constantly overthink about it and would only play football if my friends were playing it. I always had moments of intense motivation that changed into moments of overbearing laziness that took over me. I always train for the sake of training, for my friends to not call me undedicated but never for myself or my dream. What do I do?