Emotional pain is likely the easiest to come by. Fortunately, I think it's also the quickest to pass away. Every where we turn, we see emotion. Friends, family, coworkers, and advertisements can be in your face all day. We can become immune to it -that's the boat I feel to be in mostly- or we can become overstimulated. It's good to understand emotional constructs around us. It can enable us to understand people better and elevate our abilities to navigate. I do however, think we could all take a small step back from the daily emotional roller coaster because most of the emotions are not lasting. We are bombarded with emotions all the time, and we want to react. However, with a healthy relationship to our own emotions and how they function, we can learn to let most of them pass us by without giving in to the emotional draw. It can be exhausting to react appropriately to every emotional need thrown our way. How many emotional "emergencies" are you still experiencing from yesterday? How about last week? Last month? As you reflect, you'll notice that the further back you go, the fewer emotional catastrophes were actually as bad as they first seemed. Start practicing this skill. Let the nonsense in your life pass you by so that you have more bandwidth for your family and priorities instead.

This was a tough one to write. For me, I think of the day when I learned an immediate family member nearly took his own life. I didn't understand. I thought I could have been part of the problem, then I wondered if I should have been part of the solution, but I didn't know how. I was only a teenager at the time, but it stuck with me in a really dark way for a long time. I wanted to understand why these things happened; how they transpired and how they dissolved in a healthy manner. I've since dived deep into psychological material and studied human behavior to help me understand the whys and hows of these dark periods. I wanted to be prepared for how to react and help someone if this were to ever happen again. I'm not saying you need to become a psychiatrist, but I am saying you need to know how you're going to respond when -not if- these events happen. This wasn't easy, especially with the proximately of the relationship. Reliving the darkest hour and trying to figure out what words or actions would be appropriate at which times is horrible to think about. Yet, it is the price to pay to establish the emotional resilience required to assist someone that far gone. Twelve years later, I got another call. A different relative -though just as close- attempted to take his life and failed. I'm in the same nightmare again. The feelings of nausea are creeping back even as I write this a couple years afterward. But I knew how to respond this time. It couldn't be further from what I wanted to do, but I did it. I left work without telling anyone. No one needs to know. I'm not going to get fired for this. Before I would have fretted about the right thing to do. Should I wait until 5? Should I let his spouse or kids go in first? Nope, I hung up the phone and drove straight to the hospital. I walked quickly and directly to his room. I was the first one there. I didn't know exactly what I was going to say or do yet, but I knew I had to be there. To this day, it's the hardest thing I've ever done.

As a man, and growing up with emotionally absent parents, it's been an interesting journey establishing my emotional identity. Just 5 or so years ago, people described me as quiet, unexcitable, and apathetic. I didn't think those words described me because that's not how I felt, but I had ZERO idea how to express these ideas. Imagine how I communicated with the opposite sex! Embarrassing. My journey started when I moved after college. College was it's own beast of learning to be socially present, but I moved to Alaska from Kentucky without knowing anyone or visiting Alaska prior. I took a job as the sole electrical engineer on an island called Kodiak. Within 12 months, I had moved, started a new career, met and married my wife, and bought a house. Not everyone needs a whirlwind of a year to awaken their emotional side, but when you're as interesting as a red brick when you start as I was, you need a good jolt of life to get you going. I don't get the opportunity to eavesdrop on many conversations about me these days, but I like to think people describe me differently than when I started this journey. I still have a ways to go, but the first step was recognizing where I was initially. What's your emotional journey been so far? Take a look at the course and let me know what you think!

What words come to mind when you imagine someone describing you in the future? Patient? Strong? Resilient? Humble? (I'm sooo humble) Friendly? Calm? Selfless? Are these the same words you'd use to describe yourself today? Think about each word and someone you know who matches that word well. How do you compare? Now ask your spouse or closest friend to rate you on the word. Are you as humble as you thought? (I am). What can you do to improve? Start thinking about these words and what they really mean to you and your character. This is tough to realize, but there is no future "you"; only "you" today. "You" in 2 years is going to have the same decisions to make in order to make that progress. It won't be easier to do then! Choose well, start today, and stay humble! (I know I will) Best,

Much needed today: - "He that can have patience can have what he will." — Benjamin Franklin - "Patience is the calm acceptance that things can happen in a different order than the one you have in mind." — David G. Allen - "Patience and fortitude conquer all things." — Ralph Waldo Emerson - "Patience is the art of hoping." — Luc de Clapiers - "The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it." — Arnold H. Glasow - "Patience is the best remedy for every trouble." — Plautus - "Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance." — Samuel Johnson - "Patience is the companion of wisdom." — Saint Augustine - "Our patience will achieve more than our force." — Edmund Burke - "Endurance is nobler than strength, and patience than beauty." — John Ruskin Push on!