@Kim Kraus Round 20 ae? ... woo! haha.. thank you 🙏 .. i cant die apparently soo look out 😄

Thank you Marianne! Yes I am doing my best.. trust me i am looking everywhere for guidance! The "change", It hasn't been sudden ... its been over a few months... when things started to change... It never budged my faith! I was convinced I was "the holy son of God" .. I trusted all was working out for good. The course taught me I need never suffer, i need never fear!.. There was no Question! The fruit of my actions was proof i was in Gods favour... AS i said (in my first post)... There is line in the sand when, in this 3rd density "illusion" you just have to acknowledge.. things are going bad! ... Thats the rules of this place.. I had to reach out externally... I know thats not what the course teaches... its says to go internally, all the answers are inside, you just need ask the HS ... but I'm in a corner... I have to reach out, im going insane here :( literally! I never wanted to post my message, because that is showing "lack".. EGO! This is my confusion..... But I have to ask, God WTF are you mate?? ... Should i just be silent? suffer in silence? maybe i should have? maybe that's my lesson... just be quiet and go away ... ...I am no longer under the grace of God... This is my dilemma! I 100% know the power of the mind, and I practise every day, the course taught me this!.. Change my thoughts change my life! I embraced that whole heartedly! And i experienced the blessings of that! and so did the world around me! .. Which the course says is the only reason im here ... to save the world... not by being a famous person... but by being one of the tiny drops that makes the collective ocean of God... I realise im not special! im happy with that! I am a humble special drop happy to just drip here and there... but my power has gone, and I want to know why and how to fix it.. I know its some sort of shadow work that is required, and i have spent many a dollar and hours seeking assistance with that.. I thought i had dealt with all that.. I apparently had a 4.5km "diamond" wall around my heart one "teacher/guide" (whatever) told me and it took many sessions to break it down... for a weensy small while there apparently I was calibrating at 1000! .. i know what your thinking... I thought it was a bit unrealistic myself... maybe i was spiritually duped (again) who knows.. Aeeeny way, at that time 2020ish, life was amazing! everything flowed, I was contributing to the world , I was helping people and was able to see my daughter (who lives in another country, she's 7 ) often which is super super important to me and her! (oh goodness another attachment / illusion) My family was great, work was great, 3d Life was great! ...Now the wheels are falling off and Im just like, how do i fix this !🤷‍♀️...

The world is a projection of our inner being ... Maybe there is something that requires healing within. Ask God to reveal anything you need to know :) 2. Let God look after the world, everything is working out for good, sometimes from our perspective, we can't see the full picture .. Hope that is useful

100%!

You can find all the lessons here https://acim.org/workbook-lessons-overview/workbook-table-of-contents/ or on you tube :)

Why am I a 1 ? ... meh... I like it !😃