Grateful for - Amanda encouraging me to sit down and take a moment to sit with her last night instead of keeping my unrelenting pace to keep knocking things off the list after having the kids all day by myself. - Amanda taking a moment to check in with me this morning after noticing I was having a moment of panic - Grateful for the mental work she put in to keep winter break camps on her radar - Grateful of her presence of mind to let me know our 5yr old was in burn the world down mode this afternoon after a day at day camp. And her ability to handle herself enough until I got home to handle the angry elf.

I’m grateful for: 💯Amanda sharing she was a bit frazzled and asking me to take on the kids Sunday so she could have a bit of a mental break. In the past she hasn’t been good about voicing that need. 🥋Amanda taking on the mental load of making sure the kids had their uniforms ready for the taekwondo tournament yesterday. While she took that on I made sure we all had lunches made. 👕 for a partner that can remember what clothes the kids may need for the upcoming season. An area where I feel like I could help more in. 😤 I’m grateful Amanda gave me the space to deal with our angry little elf (5 yr old boy who was hell bent on burning the world down) this week instead of jumping in and trying to take control of the situation

I'm Grateful for: - the mental load my wife took on to help our 8 yr old during trick or treating when a friend ditched him. - even though she was tired last night when she got home she put the kids to bed by herself so i could stay and help setup for the kids taekwondo tournament - grateful for Amanda spending some of her emotional labor to getting things ready this morning while I was making breakfast - lastly grateful she takes on the lions share of the mental gymnastics that is our family budget

- I’m grateful my partner has a bit of flexibility in her schedule to meet the kids off the bus most days. - For Amanda participating in our couples counseling today even though she seems mentally tapped - I’m grateful for the mental load she puts into managing our budget - And incredibly thankful she has the flexibility in her day to do loads of laundry. She is a rock star!

I'm sharing a success story: I struggled with mental load and I resolved it without saying a word to my husband. Disclaimer: I know my circumstances were unusual. So what happened was that my husband agreed to care for our 1 year old son by himself for a total of 6 months this year to allow me to finish my Master's abroad. The shortest span was 6 weeks and the longest was 3 months. I got back in October and we've since discussed mental load as something I bore alone in the past. I was so happy to hear my husband doing mom math as we prepared to get to an event on time. He now appreciates the importance of being efficient on a morning because a 5 minutes now can make you 30 minutes late for work. He now takes the initiative to prep meals the night before and doesn't waste time playing with our son or watching his phone on mornings. There are no words I could've used to give him a deeper understanding than living it for weeks at a time. However, he has also admitted that it was extremely important for him to decide to take on that challenge without being pressured by me. Otherwise, he might've resented me. Instead, he said that because he chose to do it willingly, even if he wanted to blame someone he would only blame himself. So maybe this is a challenge to the men. Would you be willing to send your wife away for a week to truly walk in her shoes? I'm sure she would appreciate the break and you would both be eager to share the mental load more equally when she returns.