Progress Report…
I think I need to start celebrating how far I’ve come & share my progress instead of despairing how much farther I have to go. To stop trying to work so hard and just be happy I’m not where I used to be 🙏
Would love to hear your wins & progress as well!
It’s only been 2 weeks since finding Aaron Marks “Forgiveness Challenge” on YouTube and joining this group and I’m already starting to feel some release!
Yay!
I was feeling so much resentment & hatred for everyone in my life for lack of support in doing this work and for always expecting me to be the strong one who listens and holds space for & supports them but then when I’m hurting and struggling I’m totally alone with it all.
I felt like I’m bleeding to death yet they wanted me to always be happy , encouraging & supportive for them.
At first when I took my space & got some distance from them I struggled with immense guilt for this like I was doing something wrong or bad by taking care of myself & not being available to them .
But now…..I have ZERO guilt about it! 🥰🙌
I stopped worrying about if they think that I’m not a loving person because im emotionally unable & unavailabe and starting allowing myself to have needs and trust my guidance in how those needs would get met and it feels so good being free from this 🙌🥰
I also started working on forgiving them and letting them just be where they’re at and enjoy the friendships for what they are and appreciate & love them for who they are .instead ❤️
And so now I can enjoy our time spent together instead of accusing & judging them (in my head)
You guys have really helped me feel more encouraged in doing this work since I have no friends right now who know about ACIM
My old self (before I got fucked up by the abuse)
didn’t need anyone on the same path as me spiritually because my spiritual path was always very private and personal and I’d allow others to have their own path and would just find common ground and love each other for who we are . And anytime I had a struggle, I just went within , journaled and processed synthesized and integrated it on my own with god , then afterwards, went back out into the world to love again….
But 2020 I fell into a DEEP Dark night of the soul with intense CPTSD Flashbacks, DPDR which brought
back the long list of physical health issues & intense pain and it was just WAY too much to process all by myself
But I’m happy to say I no longer have intense Flashbacks, no longer in a constant state of terror feeling like I’m in a horror movie I’m trying to escape🙌
The DPDR is way less intense & I’m no longer collapsing onto the floor, thinking I’m dying and unsure if I should call 911 or just let myself die.
I’ve made peace with death but am choosing Life
So I’m feeling much more peace now thank god! 🙌❤️
Thank you for letting me share 🙏
I really appreciate & am thankful for this group.
Happy to be seeing more light at the end of the tunnel ❤️🥰
Love hearing other peoples stories/wins because it’s encouraging …. so please do share!
I would love to hear about it🙏❤️🥰
What are some of your wins/progress we can celebrate?
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Brandi Jade
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Progress Report…
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