Over the past year, I have battled with what we call “imposter syndrome” and, It has been more prevalent in my thoughts than ever before. I’m booking at higher rates for weddings and I’m inching more and more into the commercial space. So, it is not from lack of work. I can relate it to this particular project I had worked on for a college. That project was given to me because they didn’t want to spend what they had previously spent on digital marketing. The video came out to be exactly what this client had asked for. But the dean of the college didn’t like it and so they decided to go back to the previous studio for their upcoming yearly commercial. A few things for perspective. Even though this gutted me I had to realize a few things. I was working with a much smaller budget, it was only myself that shot and edited the final project. I also did not have a crew or ample setup time. Most of the time I was having to be ready within as little time as 10-15 minutes. It was a super tight schedule that I had no control over. My mistake? I did not come in as an expert in the very beginning. I came in as a people pleaser trying to land a bigger project from them in the future. I set the bar very low for them and should have insisted on a proper budget, more time, and strict shooting rules for things such as filming at certain times of the day and being able to light my scene for better results. I say this to all of you because we will all be made to feel like we aren’t good enough at some point if we stay in this long enough. The funniest thing is the Dean said he liked the other company because they shot with “movie” cameras. I was shooting with an FX3 and they shot with a C100. He was looking at the tracks they laid out for the dolly and the rigged out C100. It looked big production and I feel like the appearance of how we show up has a lot to do with perception of the final product. So, go out there and do your best and always look ahead and not backwards. I almost gave up video production just because of this one incident. So glad I didn’t. Lots of things are heading in the right direction for me and I’m excited to see where it all goes.