Yeah... This Is Hard · Easier Ways

Yeah... This Is Hard

Here’s the truth: being human is freaking hard.

Now, that might sound obvious, but think about it—since we were kids, we’ve been sold this idea that if we just get enough money, love, or control over things, life will magically smooth out. But reality doesn't work that way. Eventually, life smacks us upside the head and reminds us that "hard" doesn’t even begin to cover it. Life can throw stuff at us that makes “hard” feel like a cute little understatement.

We spend a lot of our time trying to escape it—distracting ourselves, numbing ourselves, setting impossible goals so we feel “worthy.”

But when you dig down, most of that comes from one core thing: we don’t feel safe in who we are.

We don’t trust that we’re enough just as we are.

If you want to feel safer in your own skin, you’ve got to quit running from discomfort and learn to be okay with it. And no, I’m not talking about some toxic positivity nonsense. I’m talking about not fighting reality, not pretending things are better than they are. It’s about accepting the complexities of life and facing it without denial or sugar-coating.

Think about it: life isn’t going to stop being unpredictable or difficult.

We can’t change that.

But what we can change is how we respond to it.

That starts with letting go of the idea that you need to control or fix everything to feel secure.

First, start by being honest about what you can and can’t control.

Most of our anxiety comes from trying to control things that are out of our hands—what other people think, what might happen tomorrow, what the world looks like five years from now.

But trying to manage all that is like trying to hold water in your hands.

Instead, focus on the things you can control, like how you spend your time today, who you surround yourself with, and how you talk to yourself when things go sideways.

Next, learn to sit with uncomfortable feelings rather than trying to dodge them.

Think of it like building emotional muscle.

When you’re afraid, sit with that fear. When you’re insecure, face it. Don’t try to avoid it; you’re just prolonging the struggle. Talk with someone trustworthy. The more you practice, the more you realize you can handle way more than you thought—and that’s what really builds confidence.

And one of the most powerful ways to feel safe in the human condition?

Own your screw-ups and flaws.

Let yourself be imperfect because trying to be perfect is exhausting, and trying to make life meet your expectations is, too.

Accept the fact that sometimes you’re going to suck, sometimes you’ll make a mess, and sometimes you’ll fail. This isn’t about lowering your standards or pretending everything’s fine—it’s about recognizing that you can handle being human.

Ultimately, feeling safer in your skin isn’t about having all the answers or never feeling insecure.

Feeling safer in your own skin isn’t about having it all figured out or never feeling insecure. It’s about knowing you can handle whatever life chucks at you. Funny enough, the second you stop scrambling to "be enough" and just let yourself be, things start feeling right.

Feeling safer in your own human experience isn’t about invincibility; it’s about knowing you can take the hits, learn from them, and keep going no matter what.

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