Psychedelic & Plant Medicine Integration Call

The past 3-years I've been on a deep and expansive journey as I've worked my way toward sobriety after 2 decades of binge drinking, recreational substance abuse, festival fun and woodlen rave adventures. Always the last one to leave the dance floor, a DJ's DREAM, I'd built a glitter empire and was the life of the party, hostess with the mostess, the most sequin jumpsuits, the most silk kimonos, the most diamante face stickers, and the most whippets stashed behind the sofa. They called me, Madame Sparkles. And everyone loved to play with, Madame ✨.

Psychedelics came to me much later in my recreational adventures, and changed the game completely. All of a sudden I could no longer hide from myself and the years of early childhood and adolescent complex trauma I'd been running from for almost two decades.

Mid-dancefloor disco banger, all of a sudden these strange, uncomfortable, creepy feelings would begin to emerge from depths unknown, that for a while I was able to push back down, masking the unknown with my old faithful chemical friends (IYKYK). But after a while, I could no longer hide behind my sequin jumpsuits, glitter and wigs. Nope, Mama Mushroom and Lucy Lu had other plans install for me. They wanted to introduce me to some old shadowy pals of mine that had been lingering in the dark, since, oh I don't know, what felt like the dawn of time?!

I spent years exploring psychedelics in both the party/ festival scene, as well as ceremonies, and have experienced both the most joyous, awe inspiring ineffable, and "aha God" experiences, as well as the most difficult and terrifying experiences of my life, think underworld entities vibes.

Looking back, I can see now that I put myself in these intense situations over and over again, because of my deep, deep desire to know myself as God. I didn't know this at the time, I was just "partying" and going along with what everyone else was doing - it was part of my socialization. But I can see now how divine the unfolding of all of it really was. I just LOVED having these multidimensional adventures and discovering secrets of the universe. For a while there, hanging out with aliens, dancing on UFOs, and completely detaching from my body and floating in the void was so much fun, I was just doing it on my own in bed on a Friday night to have those consciousness expanding experiences.

I chuckled earlier this year when I discovered my gene keys life path siddhi is ECSTASY 🌈💖

I’m literally here to know myself as divine ecstasy. Fortunately, I now have access to that divine ecstasy in meditation/ everyday life and no longer need or seek external things to “get me there”. Turns out it was right here in my heart at all along ☺️

As I embarked on my spiritual journey and underwent healing, my sensitivity heightened. I found that I couldn't engage in the same activities or consume substances without experiencing intense multidimensional encounters and overwhelming strain on my nervous system. Eventually, I lost the desire to pursue these heightened states through substances. In fact, my last few experiences were deeply challenging and left me feeling completely broken. There was a point where I doubted if I could recover from the terror I had endured. However, thanks to the dedicated integration work I have done since then, I can honestly say that I owe my life to this process.

The psychedelic integration sessions I participated in played a monumental role in making me feel safe, seen, and most importantly, not alone. Over the past two years, I have immersed myself in the study of psychedelics, exploring their potential for healing, understanding their risks, learning how to prepare, and integrate them, in an attempt to understand what happened to me when I thought I had officially "broken my brain".

I came to realize that what I was experiencing aligned with Stan Grof's description of a spiritual emergency. It felt like a textbook case, giving me hope that I could transform my life even amidst this dark night of the soul. Instead of viewing it as a traumatic event that ruined my life, I chose to see it as an opportunity to break free from false identities and embrace my true self. I've since been recalibraiting to my true self and the work I've done in this community has played a huge role in that. Sharing this story feels vulnerable, and I am still working through feelings of shame and fear of persecution. However, I also understand that these experiences have served me, enabling me to help others integrate challenging or ineffable experiences in altered states. They teach us valuable lessons, and when we take the time to learn from them, the insights gained can bring about a beautiful transformation when applied to our daily lives.

With all of that said, if anyone in this community would like a safe space to share, unpack, and integrate the insights you've gained from your personal experiences in altered states, whether it be with psychedelics, plant medicine, recreational substance, or meditation and other ineffable spiritual experiences, I would be honoured to hold that space and offer a weekly or fortnightly call in here. Cause let's be honest, who here doesn't love talking about the mysteries of universal consciousness!?

Let me know in the comments below if you're interested and if so choose a time that works best for you from the poll.

All the love,

Madame 💖🫠

11:00 Mondays AEDT (Melbourne)

11:00 Tuesdays AEDT (Melbourne)

11:00 Wednesdays AEDT (Melbourne)

9:00 Tuesdays AEDT (Melbourne)

9:00 Wednesdays AEDT (Melbourne)

3 votes

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